Applying for medical cannabis
This is the process for normal private medical weed in the UK, this is non-subsided/full price. You may qualify for subsidised medication; see: Applying for medical cannabis (Project 21)
Most of these clinics offer video consulations, you don't need to live near one (eg. N.Ireland, Scottish Highlands)
1. Find a clinic. Google 'medical cannabis clinics' and choose the one with the prices you like. Prices for an initial appointment can range from £100 - £220.
2. Fill out the form on their website to register. You will need to give them permission to access your medical records. They will ask you questions on the form - this is dependent on the company. Be truthful on this.
4. After a few days/a week you should hear back. If they accept you thus far you have achieved an administrative goal but that is all. You still need to make the appointment. You get your card out and make the payment and choose a slot online.
5. You have your appointment. Your specialist will hold a telemedicine call with you. You will find out in advance what sort of specialist you are seeing. If you have serious pain you will see a different specialist to one who deals with psychological disorders. They will ask you lots of questions. The appointment can last anything from 10 minutes up to the full hour. In the interests of people not trying to 'game' the system and do the rest of us with legitimate needs a disservice I'm not going to write what is discussed in the appointment but suffice it to say it's a general chat about your conditions, your health history etc. Bear in mind they've seen your record already. Don't second guess yourself. You are a stoner, you have been for years. You know it, the specialist knows it. Don't be shifty. Have your ID ready.
6. Your expert will be an expert. They have more letters after their names representing their qualifications than you do in your entire family tree (unless you're Polish or Dutch). They will be some of the only doctors in the UK who have any knowledge of this plant. They make your GP look like they are winging their entire careers. But you can feel comfortable expressing your wishes too. The specialist will discuss the strain you want. Bear in mind all clinics offer different products but high THC flower and oils are available.
7. If you get approved the doctor will tell you there and then if it's clear-cut. If it is then it's an 'administrative' signing off on you (a formality) and then the pharmacy will phone you within a week of your appointment.
8. The pharmacy will call you and say 'that's £xxx please'. You will splutter. You will then say 'I don't need that much (I recommend getting more, however, due to supply issues). Can we start at 20g and go from there?' They will oblige.
9. Your legal weed will be delivered to your house within a week of the call with the pharmacy. I and other purely private users (not through T21) are experiencing delays of maybe... 3 or 4 days? You may need to be patient. This country is big-time backward on cannabis right now but it's going to improve.
10. Your quality of life improves immediately as you vaporise your medicine as directed on your prescription. You have a repeat appointment (£100) every month. You then pay each month for your cannabis. This is truly dependent on your needs. I cannot advise on price because I have no idea how it's calculated. There's no itemised bill, there's just an amount of cannabis for me and money each month goes out on my already-suffering overdraft (£350 for 60g). I am still working on figuring it out as I don't think I've fully understood how it's distributed from the pharmacy and how they calculate it. I refer you back to the top where I state you need spare £££s because with the monthly appointment you're spending upwards of £450 a month. But like I have said elsewhere, for those of us with careers we sweated blood over to get where we are but would lose with one caution or DUI offence, or a parent who wants to not risk social services, or someone with chronic pain and a strong reliable income source or for the retiree who needed something to blow their pension on; it's priceless.